Intaxication |
Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with. |
Foreploy |
Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting sex. |
Sarchasm |
The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it. |
Hipatitis |
Terminal coolness. |
Osteopornosis |
A degenerate disease. |
Glibido |
All talk and no action. |
Reintarnation |
Coming back to life as a hillbilly |
Bozone |
(n.) The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future. |
Cashtration |
(n.) The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period. |
Giraffiti |
Vandalism spray-painted very, very high. |
Inoculatte |
To take coffee intravenously when you are running late. |
Karmageddon |
It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer. |
Dopeler |
The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly. |
Beelzebug |
(n.) Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out. |
Caterpallor |
(n.) The color you turn after finding half a grub in the fruit you're eating. |
Decafalon |
(n.) The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you. |
Arachnoleptic fit |
(n.) The frantic dance performed just after accidentally walking through a spider web. |
Ignoranus |
A person who's both stupid and an asshole. |